As an independent artist who creates Adult Contemporary Hip-Hop, I am free to describe my real experiences, as a grown man, without worrying about conforming to stereotypes or dominant narratives. For example, while fathers are rarely celebrated in mainstream rap, I’ve written a Father’s Day dedication for my dad, with a perspective no less authentic than songs that say “he wasn’t there” and “my mom hates me because I look like my father.”
The deadbeats get enough shine. I have an excellent relationship with my father and I hope all of you reading this, who know men who have loved, worked, and sacrificed to ensure good lives for their children will join me in celebrating him and remembering the good men you know the next time someone talks like those fathers don’t exist.
Overcoming all obstacles with intelligence and confidence, my dad worked his way up to executive positions at prominent companies and also operated his own small (but very successful) business. In addition to being my playmate and my model for manhood and strength, he is still someone I turn to for insights on business and investing. He taught me how to make moves and how to ask questions that cut to what matters.
Ten years ago my father had a severe stroke that left him partially paralyzed and nearly took his life. At the time, doctors and nurses said they had never seen anyone go that far down hill from a stroke and survive, but he did. The doctors said he would never walk again, and although it was difficult, he did. That’s just like dad: always defying expectations. Still, as other families of stroke survivors know, the effects of a stroke are long lasting and life altering, and this has certainly been true in my dad’s case. But he’s still fighting.
My song “Waiting for the Day” is dedicated to my father and it tells the story of my father’s stroke while speaking to our closeness and how he has shaped me into the man I am today. You can listen to it at
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7bxAv0Q_5Q
My dad showed me the blueprint for how to be there for my future children. He’s truly been my hero and he has done everything he could in his life to make my life better than his. My father has often told me how proud he is of me and my success, but now it is my turn (and as a gift to him I am doing it very publicly!).
Let’s celebrate all of the fathers: real men who have been present and accounted for in their children’s lives. The third Sunday of June is for them. We can celebrate mothers or spit on deadbeats another day. Salute!
You can reach R.S. at
www.adultcontemporaryhiphop.com. Coverage of R.S. and his music has appeared in The Financial Times, AllHipHop.com, Business Insider, Der Spiegel, Yahoo! Finance, and other publications.
